


Sweet.

by TheRepeat



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Comedy, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2017-12-15
Packaged: 2019-02-15 05:54:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13024641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRepeat/pseuds/TheRepeat
Summary: When Robin entered Ylisstol Castle's armory for a routine inspection, she found Gaius sitting on the floor with a little bird perched on his finger."What the..."





	Sweet.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for Laney Lu as part of a Secret Santa art exchange on Discord. Merry Christmas, Laney!

“What the…”

Rubbing her eyes didn’t change the image before her, nor did it diminish her disbelief. Frowning with a mixture of surprise and disappointment, Robin marched over to Gaius. “Gaius, _what_ are you doing.”

“Shh, you’ll scare her off.” Gaius wasn’t looking at her. Sitting cross-legged in the middle of the armory’s floor, he seemed more intent on staring at the bird perched atop his finger than his approaching wife.

Though, he was smiling nicely at the little bird. Robin couldn’t help but think his fixation was pretty cute, but she couldn’t just let him get away with… whatever this was. “Alright, well, I’ve got some questions.”

“If you can ask ‘em quietly, go for it.”

Robin sighed impatiently, and lowered her voice. “Okay, first question. Why is there a bird on your finger?”

“Hmm…” Gaius was apparently enraptured by the little creature, and took a few moments to process her question. “…I stole her.”

“You stole her.”

“Yup.”

Robin pinched the bridge of her nose. “Okay. Okay, you stole a bird. Cool. That raises a few more questions, but I’ll get to them later.” She took a breath to compose herself. “Why are you sitting in the middle of the armory? You could’ve taken it back to our room.”

“Her.”

“What?”

“Taken _her_ back to our room.”

Robin’s frown deepened. “…Yeah, anyway. Answer the question.”

Gaius chuckled a little bit, but not too much, for fear of disturbing the bird. “Knew you’d be here, that’s why.”

“So you were _hoping_ I would walk in on you like this.”

“Nah, you’ve got it all wrong, Bubbles.” At last, he looked at her, smiling and giving her a wink. “I wasn’t ‘hoping’ anything. You always check on the armory at this time.” He then turned back to the bird.

Robin began to pace, frustrated. “So—you, you _knew_ I was gonna be here, and you decided to come show off your contraband bird, is that it?” In spite of her mood, she felt compelled to snap her fingers and smile: “Contrabird.”

Gaius laughed. “Nice.” He glanced at her again. “Stop pacing, though. You’re gonna stress out Robin.”

Robin didn’t stop pacing. “Huh?”

“The bird. Her name is Robin.”

“I’m getting more lost by the second.”

“The bird,” Gaius repeated patiently. “I named her Robin.”

“Why did you name the bird after me?”

Gaius blinked. “I didn’t. She’s a robin, so it seemed like it fit. Look at her. See?”

Robin stopped pacing. “Am I being pranked? Is that what’s going on?”

Gaius’s eyebrows furrowed now. He seemed to be in a trance, Robin was realizing. This damn bird had him hypnotized. That’s why he was being so weird, had to be. “What? No, of course not. Why is this stressing you out so much?”

“Because this isn’t the normal kind of weird from you!” Robin exclaimed; at the volume, Robin (the bird, that is) flapped its wings momentarily, but didn’t leave Gaius’s finger. Gaius gave Robin (the tactician, that is) a stern glance, so she (Robin, that is) (the tactician, that is) rolled her eyes and lowered her voice. “You know what I mean. You’re the I Love Candy Guy, not the I Steal Birds Guy. What’s the deal?”

“Full disclosure?”

“Please.”

Gaius shrugged. “She was cute, and the old owner was a jerk. So I gave her a new home, and a better name.”

“Aw,” said Robin sweetly, but then she shook her head; still falling for his honeyed words after all this time? “Okay then. Last question.”

“Shoot.”

“And I really want a straightforward answer, okay?”

“You betcha.”

“Alright.” She pointed at his lap, where one of his legs crossed over the other one. “Why is your right leg bleeding?”

Gaius sighed. “Yeah, I figured you’d notice that.”

“H-How could I _not_ notice? There’s a trail of blood leading to you!”

“Yeah, well.” Gaius nonchalantly petted the bird with his finger; the robin crooked her head into his touch. “I _did_ say the owner was a jerk.”

“D-Did he hurt you?!” Robin started to hurry to the armory’s exit: “I’ll go get Liss—”

“Robin, I’m fine,” Gaius said with a laugh, and Robin hesitated in the doorway. With his free hand, Gaius gestured her over. “Take a chill pill, alright?”

Robin slowly approached him. He offered her his hand, but instead of taking it, she frowned with concern as she stood over him. Her eyes were fixed on the wound. “Was it an arrow?”

“Dagger,” Gaius answered. “No, wait—knife. Dinner knife. They guy was an innkeeper, so it wasn’t like he was well-armed.”

“You robbed an innkeeper?”

“No, I _burgled_ him. There’s a difference.”

“You know what I mean. Which innkeeper was it?”

Gaius shrugged. “Robert. You know, the guy with the inn named after himself. Over in downtown Ylisstol, you know the one.”

“Oh, sheesh. Yeah, that guy _is_ a jerk.”

Gaius smiled, gesturing at the bird in his hand. “Right?”

“B-But not enough to _steal_ from! Give me the bird; I’m going to return it!”

“Her.” Gaius leaned away from Robin defensively. “And no, she’s mine.” Smiling dumbly, he rubbed his cheek against the bird. “My little Robin…”

Of all the emotions that had churned within Robin in the last few minutes, she was especially displeased to find that the latest one was _jealousy._ “Wh—But—no, _I’m_ your little Robin!”

“But you hate it when I call you that,” Gaius said, closing his eyes and continuing to hug bird-Robin.

“But—That’s—” Robin was growing more flustered. “G-Gaius, you’re not some common thief! Give me the bird; whether the innkeeper is a jerk or not, you shouldn’t have stolen from him!”

Gaius sighed. His eyes were locked onto the robin’s, wistful. “…She’s so cute though. You don’t have to be jealous.”

“I’m—I’m not—Jealous?! Me?! Over a _bird?_ Are you accusing me of—of aviary envy?” She amused herself sometimes.

“Ha! ‘Aviary envy.’ I like that, Bubbles.”

Robin tried not to glow from his praise like she usually did. She didn’t know many people who appreciated her wordplay, which was part of why Gaius was so special to her, but she didn’t want to be distracted by his charm this time.

“Give me the bird,” she said sternly. “C’mon, Gaius.”

Gaius frowned. “…Yeah, you’re right.” He raised Robin, offering her to Robin. “Here.”

Robin was taken aback. “Uh… Really?”

“Yup.”

Neither of them moved for a moment. Robin plucked at her wing with her beak.

“…Gaius, I’m going to take the bird back,” Robin said. “Like, to the innkeeper.”

“I understand that.”

“And you’re… okay with that?”

“Yeah.”

Hesitantly, and pausing every now and again in case Gaius was pulling some sort of trick, Robin crouched down and put her finger next to Gaius’s. Obediently, Robin hopped onto Robin’s finger. Robin flinched a bit at the touch of the bird’s talons (not pain really, just surprise), and she slowly stood up. “You’re really sure?”

“Yeah. I did wrong; she needs to be returned.”

“…As long as…” Robin started to walk away, “…we’re on the same page.”

“You bet.” Gaius waved shortly. “I’m gonna get this cut looked at while you’re at it. See ya.”

“Bye.”

While Robin left the armory, making to leave Ylisstol Castle, she felt a sort of bemused surreality about the situation. _How did I end up with a bird?_ Well, whatever. She knew where she had to take it.

Robin glared at Robin. “You aren’t special. You’re just a bird!”

Robin, being just a bird, stared blankly back. She then lost interest and started just looking around.

“Well, don’t think you’ll seduce me like you did my husband.” She rubbed the top of Robin’s head with her fingertip. “You disgust me.”

She continued nuzzling the bird, an unwitting little smile growing on her face as she continued. Then, she suddenly realized she’d stopped walking just for that. Hugging her cloak tighter, Robin exited the castle, braving the winter chill.

She grinned a bit as she looked around the town. Oh, she loved Ylissean winters. Not bitter like Regna Ferox, but cold enough to cover Ylisstol in a layer of powdery snow. Watching it gently drift down from the sky made for a lovely evening. Her hand, however, was exposed to the cold while holding the robin; likewise, she could feel the bird shivering. Robin solved both of their problems by tucking her hand, and the bird, into her pocket. The bird nestled comfortably in there, poking just its head out.

 _Okay,_ Robin thought, chuckling, _she is pretty cute._  

It wasn’t much of a walk before Robin reached the inn in question. She had been practicing what she would say beforehand, which mostly consisted of apologies for her husband’s behavior and insistence that he’d had a bit too much sugar after dinner.

All that fell apart, really, when she reached the door and saw the innkeeper’s stupid name plastered on the door. Gods, what a blowhard. She’d just ditch the bird and get out of here.

Entering the inn, Robin scanned the room to find the man standing behind the front desk, looking surly as always. She’d never seen a scowl so obnoxious, and when his eyes lifted up to meet her, she felt a shudder of revulsion run down her spine. “H-Hello, Mr. Robert.”

“Rob,” the man grunted. “Just Rob.”

“…Sure.” Not wanting to mince words with this guy, Robin gently lifted Robin out of her pocket. “Anyway, I—”

Rob’s eyes lit afire. “Is that my bird?!”

“Er, yes.”

Rob circled around the counter. “Give it back!”

Robin reflexively retreated. “Her,” she corrected without thinking. “And, that’s why I’m here. My husband, he—”

“Don’t care.” The man roughly snatched Robin out of Robin’s hand, eliciting an uncomfortable tweet from the bird. “Don’t come back, y’hear? I don’t tolerate thieves.”

In spite of herself, indignation raised in Robin. “I’m not a thief! I came to return—”

“Yeah, whatever.” Rob gestured dismissively… with the bird, and he received more irritated chirps for his callousness. “I’ll overlook it this one time. You’re welcome.” He started walking away.

“You—What a—Where do you get off saying—?” Robin couldn’t quite get out a full sentence, unprepared for his rudeness. Hindsight was screaming at her that she should’ve seen this coming, though. She’d known he was a jerk, and more than that, he hurt Gaius! He didn’t deserve that bird! Robert? More like… _rudebert!_ Got ‘im. (Puns are difficult when flustered, but she felt like she had to try.)

“Fine!” Robin exclaimed. “Stop right there!” She reached into her cloak.

Robert turned around, an annoyed leer to his eye, but that attitude quickly dissipated. Lightning crackled in Robin’s hand, the other clutching a Thunder tome.

“You got me,” Robin said determinedly. “You said I’m a thief, right? Well, if you say so! Now be nice and give me that bird.”

 _What in the nine hells am I doing?!_ Her legs were shaking!

But that look in his eye was priceless. Oh man, the innkeeper looked like he was going to wet himself. This was _so_ illegal, too. What a thrill!

Sure enough, the blowhard returned the bird to her, which Robin safely stored in her pocket. “Good. Now, I’ll be on my way. With _my_ bird.”

Backing out of the inn, not looking away from Robert for a second, Robin found that her adrenaline was fading into thoughts of _this was such a bad idea, oh gods, what was I thinking_.

Once she was out of the door, too, she started running. What on earth? This stupid bird was _not_ worth—

“Uwah!” A hand seized Robin’s arm and tugged her into an alley. While she was reaching for her tome, some way to defend herself, her attacker spoke.

“Hey there, Bubbles. You did it!”

“Wh…” Robin stopped struggling. “Gaius?”

“Uh-huh.” With his other hand, Gaius reached into Robin’s pocket and pulled out the bird. “She’s a cutie, isn’t she?”

“I-I don’t know what came over me, I—”

“Don’t worry about it! I figured you’d end up taking the bird back. Counted on it, actually.” Gaius petted Robin’s head. The bird’s, that is. “I knew you’d like her.”

“Gaius!” Robin brushed off Gaius’s hand. “What is going on?! I’m so confused!”

“Don’t worry,” Gaius said, “it’s nothin’ serious. I just wanted something interesting to happen today.”

“Something _interesting?_ It was illegal!”

“Yeah, yeah, but that’s not the point. See, eventually, I can say you really did something today. And everything really came together perfectly.” Gaius faced her. “…You had some fun, right?”

“A… a little, yeah.” Robin took a deep breath. “…Okay, okay. I’m calm now. Can we just… go home?”

“Sure,” Gaius said. “And let’s be sure to chronicle today’s events, yeah? It’ll go down in history.”

“Why do you keep saying things like that?” Robin asked. “What’s the big deal about today?”

“Today’s the day I one-upped you, you see,” Gaius said.

“…Huh?”

Gaius was grinning from ear to ear. “You’re the pun master, y’know. I _love_ that stuff. You’re so cute whenever you get all excited about a new pun.”

Robin blushed. “G-Gaius, c'mon…”

“I’ve been planning today for a long time, I’ll have you know,” Gaius said. “Later, I’m gonna tell Morgan all about it. You know what I’ll tell him?”

“What?”

Gaius licked his lips. “‘Today, Robin was robbin’ Robin the robin from Rob in Rob Inn.’”

Robin had no words.

For a long time.

She was beaten. Absolutely, convincingly defeated.

Her heart was beating faster than it ever had.

Her cheeks had never been redder.

Finally, staring into the eyes of the man she loved, while he smirked back, confident in his victory, she was able to whisper just a few words:

“Gods, you’re perfect.”

She threw her arms around Gaius in a passionate hug.

Robin the robin chirped.

**Author's Note:**

> Extra:
> 
> Sniffing (the cold making her nose run), Robin backed out of the embrace, still holding onto her husband's forearms. "Wow, the stars must've really aligned for that, huh?"
> 
> "Yup."
> 
> "Man. The bird, the inn's name... And you must've paid off Rob to make him push me to steal the bird back, huh?"
> 
> "Nah, he's a genuine jerk."
> 
> "Oh. Hm." Robin stuffed her cold hands into her pockets. "Well... You know this means I'll have to pay you back. I'm the pun master, you know! I can't just let you have that title over me, haha."
> 
> "No way," Gaius said. "You said I'm the I Love Candy Guy, but we can BOTH be the Pun Guy. Though, it would have to be plural. Pun Guy-Us would work, don't you think?"
> 
> "Guy-Us... Gaius!" Robin hit him on the arm playfully. "Let's just get back inside."
> 
> "You bet, sweetie." Gaius leaned in to place a peck on her cold lips, making Robin shiver giddily. "Let's get goin'."
> 
> Robin took his hand, and they returned to the castle.
> 
> Robin the robin tweeted.


End file.
